Ramblings

I’m writing. I am. I don’t really know what about but I haven’t written in so long I feel like I should. Like I really should say something. Say something.

I started not writing too much in the summer. Kids home means no real spanking going on and what is exciting about that?

Then they went back to school an we found a new rhythm. In many ways it has been a time of growth for both of us. He has started to take the lead more and more and I have really been working on giving him my submission. He is suddenly more confident now and demanding. I love both. I’m not even exactly sure what the trigger was for this change. Maybe it is just time…time to come to an acceptance of the roles and responsibilities of being HoH. Maybe it takes time to try all this on and to find a level of comfort with it kind of like breaking in a new pair of shoes. After we wear them for awhile they just feel right. I think this feels right to him now.

I’m not sure if labels matter and even how they differ exactly but another thing that has changed/helped has been incorporating more D/s into our dynamic. We are Dd but we are also D/s. I don’t know exactly if I’m sure  what the difference even is except that I think for us both it involves intent. It is very purposeful.

There hasn’t been much punishment although most reconnections include at least a little bit of “discussion” about sass. That halo of mine can be a bit askew at times. It feels more natural and less forced.

I haven’t written because we are good right now. I haven’t written because  that seems boring I guess. It’s like sometimes I don’t want to mess that up by over analyzing. You know?

But at the same time I miss blogging and I miss writing. I like having my blog and being able to hash things out here. So I guess what I am saying is that I hope if there is anyone out there still reading, thank you first of all and don’t give up on me because I am here and will be here. I like having my blog. I like all of you.

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So anyway that is where we are. Starting Monday the house will fill again with college kids for winter break with all the joys and challenges that brings. He tested out quiet implements last time we did a reconnection spanking I think to find a way to continue even with everyone home. Here’s hoping.

Thanks for not giving up on me.

Leave a comment

15 Comments

  1. willie

     /  12/13/2013

    Give UP on you? Why on earth would we do that silly woman. We all go through periods of not blogging. I still ‘owe’ or feel I do my readers a post about ” Slightly New Barney” so I understand!
    Have a Merry Christmas Zoe!!!
    love willie

    Reply
    • Zoe

       /  12/14/2013

      Oh I know you won’t give up on me and I am so glad! Slightly new Barney huh? I know what you mean. I feel like I have a very new Alex.

      Reply
  2. Cindi

     /  12/13/2013

    Keep writing….I love reading your blogs.

    Reply
    • Zoe

       /  12/14/2013

      Oh hi Cindi. So glad you commented! Very happy you like my blog. That makes me want to keep writing.

      Reply
  3. Hi Zoe, missed ya, glad you re writing again
    love Jan.xx

    Reply
    • Zoe

       /  12/14/2013

      Hi Jan. I going to just keep chugging along. Hope you are feeling better. 😊

      Reply
  4. Leigh Smith (aka Sunny Girl)

     /  12/13/2013

    Still here, hope you stay here also.

    Enjoy your family and Have a Merry Christmas

    Reply
    • Zoe

       /  12/14/2013

      Oh I will stay. I like all of you too much to just disappear. You have a Merry Christmas too!

      Reply
  5. catrouble

     /  12/13/2013

    RIght here Zoe. Whenever you choose to write, whatever you choose to write about, I’ll come visit. Wishing you and your family and Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

    Blessings…Cat

    Reply
  6. quiet sara

     /  12/13/2013

    Those quiet implements are usually the most stingy.

    Glad to hear things are going well for you both! Don’t worry
    too much about not writing regularly. Everyone here is quite
    understanding and we are just happy to see you 🙂

    love
    sara

    Reply
    • Zoe

       /  12/14/2013

      Yes, unfortunately quiet does equal stingy but oh well. Thanks for being happy to see me and not giving up on me.

      Reply
  7. I’m not blogging so much anymore either Zoe. I can go for days and days without reading as well. It really has become ttwd, a daily part which for the most part is going really well. I process more and more with him and don’t need to do it out here so much. I still love blogland and I’m glad for the place to write when I need to. I also want to stay here for those new and struggling b/c there are those who were there for me. There’s also these old friends…silly lady. I certainly will never be giving up on you!

    Reply
  8. Roz

     /  12/17/2013

    HI Zoe, It’s great to hear from you and of course I would never give up on you! We all have our ‘quiet’ times with blogging and with reading and commenting. I also enjoy just reading about how everyone is doing … whether it’s ‘exciting’ or not LoL.

    I’m so happy to hear you and Alex are in such a good place. I think you might be right about time to find a level of comfort with ttwd.

    Hugs,
    Roz

    Reply
  9. Zoe,

    This entire post spoke to me because it really reminds me of where DH and I are. It seems that we have found a good rhythm too and don’t worry too much about labels anymore. A good place to be in my opinion. 🙂

    Reply
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